They never pick stunners to be the Panto Dame, either

Alice || Coventry
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Mum: I always feel so sorry for Dame Edna Everage. She’s such an ugly woman.

That always happens to me, too

Clare || Birmingham
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I heard my mom stomping up and down the stairs apparently looking for something. When she found it, she announced to no one in particular

Mom: Why is it ALWAYS in the last place I look?!