May 29, 2009
Hazel || Cornwall, UK
Whilst on holiday in Turkey, my mum decided to call her sister from the beach. No one answered (possibly because it was at 11am on a weekday)
Mum – I expect she’ll be outside in the garden on a beautiful sunny day like this.
May 28, 2009
Si || UK
My friend turned up at our house just as we were finishing dinner, and my mum had made Angel Delight for afters. As my friend sat down with us she turned to him.
Mum – Would you like some Afternoon Delight?
May 27, 2009
Jen || Cambridge
My mum and I never ever talk about … you know. Ever. Then one day she said this, completely out of the blue.
Mum – Don’t wait until you’re married to have sex.
Me – What?
Mum – He might be bad at it. Then you’d be stuck with him.
May 26, 2009
Abi || Maine
Someone we knew (but didn’t like much) had grown his hair long and it looked ridiculous.
Me – I just want to go at him with a pair of scissors!
Mom – Yes, and while you’re doing that, cut his hair as well.
May 25, 2009
Murphy || Swindon, UK
My mum walked in from the supermarket with about three carrier bags full … of honey.
Me – Er, what’s with the honey?
Mum – I read that it doesn’t go off, so I thought I’d stock up. You know, in case.
Me – In case of what?!
Mum – In case something happens,like a nuclear explosion.
Me – So, if there’s a nuclear explosion, we’ll be ok, because we’ve got fifty odd jars of honey?
Mum – Beaming Exactly!
May 22, 2009
David || Devon
Mum and I were driving through some woods and she was commenting on the beautiful countryside
Mum – After all, Devon is the Garden of England
Me – …Isn’t that Kent?
May 21, 2009
Danni || Cumbria
Frustrated with being single, I turned to internet dating, and met a nice sounding man. After swapping emails for a few months we decided to meet, and in the interests of safety I told my parents where I was going.
Mum – But – but – you don’t know him! What if he’s a paedophile?!
Me – I’ll probably be ok then, seeing as I’m 27.