Mum’s got the X-Factor

Siobhan || Leeds
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Whilst watching the finalists perform on X-Factor:

Mum: I think one of those guys is going to win.

They never pick stunners to be the Panto Dame, either

Alice || Coventry
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Mum: I always feel so sorry for Dame Edna Everage. She’s such an ugly woman.

That always happens to me, too

Clare || Birmingham
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I heard my mom stomping up and down the stairs apparently looking for something. When she found it, she announced to no one in particular

Mom: Why is it ALWAYS in the last place I look?!

Catch 22

Tamsin || Dorset, UK
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We were debating starting the dog on a course of tablets that evening, or leaving it to the morning when he had his breakfast

Mum: Can you open them now, and see if they’re crushable, but if they’re not, don’t open them.

It’s yellow like a sunflower!

Gina || Halifax
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Mum – “What’s custard made out of? Is it a plant?

One For The Brits Among Us

Jenni || Norwich, UK
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Mum - Who’s that lady with the big hair – off Eastenders?

Me - Barbara Windsor?

Mum - No, no… erm … Oh, I remember – Dolly Parton!

And the babies are chickerels

Alex || Cornwall, UK
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Mum - You know how a male chicken is called a cockerel?

Me - Yes…?

Mum - Is a lady chicken called a henerel?